Short answer: No but it does help.
Long answer: See below.
I recently read a piece on the Guardian website which filled me with both sympathy and frustration. Written by Hadley Freeman a respected US journalist it detailed her view of what Britain’s dating culture is like. Basically we’re a bunch of repressed people hiding behind our computers instead of having the guts to actually go up and talk to someone on the street. I’m not saying there isn’t some truth in that, but when it comes to casual dating and dating where you’re not sure what you want yet, going online is sometimes the better option.
Dating and Dating to hook up
We wear our heart on our sleeve here. Yes we are primarily about enabling consenting adults the opportunity to meet up and have sex. However we are not naïve enough to think that things never develop beyond quick shag Sex is one of the most important parts when it comes to dating and if you can’t find a compatible partner in the bedroom then the chances are you’re going to be pretty lonely. This is where online dating can help and casual dating can really help. It’s not for everybody (again we’d be naïve to claim that it was) but it does allow people to explore their sexual preferences and needs so that when it comes to finding someone you do want to spend more time with, you will have learnt more about what you like and don’t like.
Online dating just like ‘normal dating’ is equally as stressful for some people. Many women and men describe dating as being ‘worse than preparing for a job interview’. It certainly can be if you haven’t gone and prepared. Dating is supposed to be fun, but it’s also supposed to be about finding someone compatible sexually and personally. Freeman’s comments that online dating takes away the thrill of being asked out in public are valid for her, but they are not valid for everyone. Also you could argue it’s less efficient. Whilst that sounds coldly calculating, dating has always been about calculating the best possible option for you. But instead of spending months finding out about someone after you’ve kissed them in a bar and taken them home, you spend a bit more time finding out about someone before you meet them. This can root out the people you wouldn’t want to spend time or sleep with and it can help you zone in on the ones you would.
I’m not saying there aren’t flaws - after all it is easy to lie online if you want to. However it is also easy to lie to someone in person. The only difference is where and when the lie occurs. The challenge with dating be it online or off will always remain the same: finding someone who’s compatible with you.
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