People working a normal 9-5 office job will spend on average more time in work than socialising outside work. Based on this fact it is hardly surprising that more time is spend with colleagues than other people and the more time they spend getting to know these colleagues well…sometimes intimately well. The office affair has been and still is common place due to this work focused lifestyle most people are in. But is it ever a good idea?
“Sex with my boss is amazing! Unlike my girlfriend where sex is considered an inconvenience and disruption to life, my office lover doesn't consider it a chore to be gotten out of the way. Taking her and changing the power dynamic from the work norm is amazingly hot. We're both in stale but loving relationships so all we want is sex from each other. Has it put a strain on our work relationship? A little bit sometimes, it can be very...distracting! But as far as emotions go we're solid because we were clear about our intentions from the start. It can sometimes be stressful if we think someone else knows but we're quite good at being secretive.”
Mike, 34
For Mike, an affair at work has given him a much needed sexual release which has been missing from his relationship with his long term partner for some time now. Do all affairs work so well though?
As Andrew found out when you do not make it clear early on that you are looking for the same thing real trouble and heartache can occur:
“I was in need of someone new that I could connect to and thought I’d found that in my secretary. She was always very flirty and I found her very attractive so I made a move one night after a long work day together. The sex was amazing and all the hotter thanks to the forbidden feeling of fucking at work. But the problem was that because she was single and not attached at all it was just some fun for her and nothing serious, but for me it was so much more. This led to me losing both my wife and lover and being left ashamed and alone.”
Andrew, 29
This story from Andrew is a cautionary tale that we should always make sure of one thing: Both partners wanting the same thing from the affair. You need trust also so that you can be sure they will not change their mind later.
In Mike’s case both he and his lover have the same perspective and so with the ground rules laid out from the start they both got something that they weren't getting from their significant others without losing it all.
Ground rules
Here are some wise lessons to be learnt if you wish to conduct an affair with someone at work.
1. Firstly you must lay out the ground rules from the start. Make sure both of you know what you want from the affair and that those desires are compatible.
2. Be aware of your work culture: the office is a gossip space. You might think you’re being clandestine when you’re actually the talk of the office body.
3. Someone will get hurt: Be it you, or your lover or significant other there will be tears. Unless you are in a polyamorous relationship (which if you are it’s not an affair) there will be complications. Don’t be fooled and don’t fool yourself. This is a key point. If you are unhappy the best thing to do might be to leave your partner and then seek a new sexy fuck buddy on F-Buddy. Having a high sex drive is not a crime, but think about the best way to satisfy that craving first.
I will leave it to you my loyal readers to decide whether having an affair is ever right or always a bad idea.
Let us know what you think in the comments!
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