You might think it odd to have an adult dating site talk about sex addiction, but we recognise the dangers this can cause to any relationship – casual or otherwise.
What is sex addiction?
Like drugs, alcohol and cigarettes, sex provides a heady release of chemicals into the brain that are intensely pleasurable and make the user more likely to seek another ‘hit’. Just like drugs, alcohol and cigarettes, too much can have a negative impact on your health.
Sex addiction is used to describe any form of sexual activity that feels ‘out of control’. That feeling will be familiar to anyone who suffers from any form of addiction.
How do I know if I’m a sex addict?
There is a big difference between someone who enjoys sex, to someone who is addicted to sex. There are a few common symptoms sourced from various case studies and psychological experts including Dr Patrick Carnes and Paula Hall; a sexual psychotherapist based in the UK that may provide some guidance for you.
1. A feeling that your behaviour is out of control and you don’t know how to stop
2. Neglecting important day to day tasks including social, recreational and occupational activities
3. Feeling that you need more of the same sexual activity to maintain and increase the high you first felt – this can be anything from sex to masturbation to viewing pornography
4. Craving a feeling of shame – you feel deep down that what you’re doing is wrong, but you can’t help yourself from pursuing that feeling.
5. Consistently undertaking dangerous, destructive and/or high risk activities to mirror the high you feel
6. Trying to stop or control the sexual activity because you want to – this is a true recognition of your problem
7. Knowing that there may be severe consequences but still to engage in the sexual acitivity.
There are copious lists available online and in print media of the symptoms of sex addiction but the ones above appear to be the most commonly reported.
Does it make me a sex addict by being on F-Buddy?
Not at all. F-Buddy is here to help men and women pursue casual sexual relationships in a safe environment. Contrary to popular opinion we are not in the business of encouraging activity that is detrimental to the well being of our members. We must recognise the dangers of sex addiction because we are in the business of facilitating safe casual relationships. It would be irresponsible for us not to.
Does having a fuck buddy make me a sex addict?
Having a fuck buddy is one way to ensure you have a well balanced and healthy lifestyle. It is not the only way. If you are seeking a long term deeper emotional relationship, then having a fuck buddy can be one step towards making sure you are calm and relaxed about it. Like anything though, it can be a problem if you make it one. If you find you are constantly trying to hit up women or men to the detriment of the rest of your life, then we would recommend you take a step back and talk to a professional.
Stigma
There is a stigma to admitting sex addiction. Unlike drugs and alcohol which are readily accepted as medical as well as psychological problems in society, sex addiction is still considered to be solely a moral deficiency.
It is not.
Like any addiction, it is a medical and psychological condition that can be treated and you should not be embarrassed to admit to having or talking about.
Be safe and be aware
Sex should be (and mostly is), a lot of fun between consenting adults. If you find you are becoming obsessed with it though, we do encourage you to take a step back and concentrate on other areas in your life. Having a fuck buddy is great! It is also just one part of a well rounded and healthy lifestyle.
Do not lose sight of that.
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