F Buddy - BDSM

An introduction to using rope to have kinky sex

EdBennett — Mon, 12 Jun 2017 10:29:36 +0000

12 Jun 2017 - 11:29 | Tags: BDSM, kinky sex

Kinky sex has started to become a little more main stream – in many ways it feels like in a few decades time what is currently considered a little taboo and “naughty” might end up becoming just normal playing between adults! This does beg the question, how much of the enjoyment comes from the element of it being outside of the norm, of it being about pushing boundaries and being naughty. If it became normal would it a get a little boring, a little normal and therefore not that fun? From what I have experienced, I do not think that this is the case, I think that the act of being restrained is intrinstically powerful, and for a woman who is into it, will remain sexy regardless of how we start to view it as a society.

A beginners guide to tying up a girl

If you are new to the act of kicky sex, but are thinking about having a go, before jumping in there are a few things that are worth know. I am going to try and take you through a few basics here.

The rope: There are different types of rope, and it is really worth knowing this. Until you start thinking about it a rope is a rope, but there is a big difference between a nylon rope which feels a little smooth and plastic against the skin (which isn’t that nice) verses a good hemp rope that feels rough and real (much better!). Choose your rope well.
Learn some knots first: There are some great videos online, it is really worth learning a few knots before you get in and try it. I would advise learning one knot really well, rather than 5 badly. Actually you really only need one! So master one first, and expand your ability as you get more into it.
Safety – buy a pair of surgeon scissors: There is a very small chance of something going wrong, and in that event you want to be able to immediately release everything. A pair of surgeon scissors are the exact thing to have on hand. They cut through everything, and cost less than a cup of coffee on Ebay, so pick some up so that you never have to use them.
Get a safety word: This is important because it allows you to not worry about pushing things too far. If you do, they can stop it quickly and easily. This is a real must.
Try it! This is the most important step!!! Get in there and give it a go, it is the only way to learn, and trust me, learning is really fun!!!!

Have fun – stay safe – be experimental!

What’s the deal with foot fetishes?

EdBennett — Mon, 12 Dec 2016 19:01:14 +0000

12 Dec 2016 - 19:01 | Tags: fetish, foot fetish, BDSM

There are many people out there with a lot of different fetishes. In our creator’s infinite wisdom (or the randomness of evolution) we were all made to be different. We are different heights, different weights. Some of us are more academically intelligent than others of us. Some of us are built big and strong, able to carry large weights and manoeuvre objects with ease. A whole bunch of people are good at thinking tasks, and they spend their days sat in front of computer screens in offices dreaming of their wet dream of someone secretly crawly between their legs from under the table and giving them oral sex. Other people are good with their hands and have taken jobs that mean they work on their feet working physically. These jobs include mechanics, builders, plumbers, electricians. Their wet dream fantasy tends to be very different, usually them visiting a client or customer and then that somehow ending in them having sex with the customer. Different scenario, but just as raunchy. With so many natural differences between people, it seems natural and normal to me that of course people have different things that turn them on.

Sexual variety is bigger than you think

You know that there are different people with different fetishes. To be clear for a moment, when I say “fetish” I mean it in the colloquial sense. I say it to mean “things that turn people on”. The word fetish can actually mean something that is mandatory to coming, something someone *needs* in order to be sexually turned on. The number of different fetishes out there is shockingly big and they go from simple to being more complex.

They include:

Group sex – wanting lots of people involved
Water Sports – also known as being urinated on!
Cross Dressing – is a big turn on for a lot of people
Spanking – this is a really common one, if you haven’t tried it, give it a go!
Sub/Dom – having someone in charge of everything that takes place in the bedroom – and in charge of the other person

Variation is beautiful

...but what is the deal with feet?

The one I do not understand, is the foot fetish thing. What is it with feet that turn people on? Why is it that some people not only find feet a huge turn on, but actually will take it a step further and near worship peoples feet as part of their sexual expression? Is it that the foot represents the human body so it’s like holding the whole person in your hand? Is it that they are rarely seen in life as they are usually covered? Is it that they are considered dirty in some cultures and therefore a little taboo?

I have no idea, but I would love to find out. If you have a foot fetish, drop us a message via the website, and I will follow up this article with an answer to the question of: Feet – why?!

Fabricated Fornication: Rubber, Latex and Leather

EdBennett — Fri, 22 Jul 2016 16:05:13 +0000

22 Jul 2016 - 17:05 | Tags: kinky sex, BDSM, dressing up

So you have done the usual sexy clothes. If you are a guy you have been out with your best pressed shirt and shined shoes, you have also been out looking “casual” like you threw on some jeans and a t-shirt whilst in the back of your heading know that you actually spent an hour agonising over what to wear and if the jeans looked casual enough or not! If you are a girl you have experienced all the attention one gets when you go out in a boob tube and a short skirt, as well as the attention you can also wield in a long dress depending on the setting you are in. So you know what it is like to get some attention, and for most of you, you enjoyed it. Have you ever done this in a much less vanilla way however?

Going off the tracks a little you have a whole world waiting for you filled with material you have never tried. For those of you who have, I applaud your adventurous nature! For those of you who haven’t, I am here to tell you why you should be considering a step into wearing something a little more racy.

Rubber, Latex and leather have always been associated with anything from unstoppable sexiness to slutty and smuttiness. It is the realm of naughty sex, of hard fucking, of pushing the boundaries of what is acceptable in the bedroom to area’s where were the two adults not consenting, then one would almost certainly face jail time. It is about accessing your primal urges of see want take, of fucking like an animal – something that both men and women enjoy equally. So why do it?

When you put on rubber or latex, it acts like a costume. It is a material you never otherwise wear, and look you never otherwise have. This alteration of look and feel combined, allows you to step into being another version of yourself. You are still you, but you can be a different side of you. Perhaps that side is super dominant, or perhaps that side of you is submissive. Perhaps that ‘you’ wants to be thrown around, or punished, or taken ‘against’ your will, or perhaps that side of you wants to be the one to throw someone around, punish them or take them ‘against’ their will. I put the word ‘against’ in quotation marks because of course in the same way that the clothing acts as a costume to allow you to play a version of yourself, it remains play. Both people of course must be into it, and so no one is really ever taken against their actual will, they have consented to be taken in the first place. See the article on consent.

So if you want to try and step into another side of yourself, a way to do this would be to wear some material that you have never worn before. Rubber, Latex and Leather all come with a history and association of pushing the boundaries in the bedroom, so I highly recommend that you give them a go!

Fifty Shades - an old desire that people are now acting on.

EdBennett — Thu, 24 Sep 2015 10:29:26 +0000

24 Sep 2015 - 11:29 | Tags: BDSM

The massive success of Fifty shades of Grey, hasn’t really surprise the majority of women.

So the majority of women lust after a dominate successful partner. Well it’s always been that way. They just learn to deal with it. Most the time women would tingle for that kind of man, but their head would rule out and a they would find themselves a good man who would treat them well and help them raise a family.
What is surprising about the Grey phenomenon is that more and more women are starting to act on it. Seeking out those previously forbidden pleasures.

What is more surprising though is a recent study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine reported that men have submissive fantasies in equal measure to women.
Unfortunately society doesn’t give men as much opportunity to act upon the urge. Men are expected to be strong and caring, to physically take a woman and give them multiple orgasms. Some women do craze the submissive man however it tends to be much less pronounced and look down upon.

The study also showed that those who have submissive fantasies are far more likely to entertain dominant ones too. As always the golden rule of having an amazing sex life is communication. Good old honest communication. If you know what turns someone on then you have the best chance of creating that. Here at f-buddy we pride ourselves on the point that we have completely open communication. People express what they want and can find people with complimentary desires. Be it dominant, submissive or switchy, we create an environment to explore your wildest fantasies.

Don't be scared to ask

The main thing to bear in mind when using the site is don't be scared to ask. Meeting up with people in an adult manner is best if you have all the details out of the way to start with. But before even the conversation starts if you want to attract the right type of person put the details of what you are looking for in your profile. Now you may be worried that this might turn some people away but it is actually the complete opposite you will find more people will read your profile and the 5% who lshare you desire are going to be a lot more likely to contact you.

Why Vanilla Sex Works

EdBennett — Wed, 02 Sep 2015 19:20:45 +0000

2 Sep 2015 - 20:20 | Tags: vanilla sex, Kink, bondage, fetish, casual sex, BDSM

"I wish [BDSM folks] would stop referring to me as 'vanilla.' If you're making the case that everyone should be free to do what they like without being judged, why call non-BDSM people a derogatory name that implies they're all prudish bores?" – Anonymous, commenter on Bitch.

You read a lot online and off about vanilla sex vs kinky sex. It seems to me that if you’re not that interested in the more heavy kinky stuff, you get judged for either being a prude or just inexperienced. As you can see from the comment above, I’m not alone in my theory. I’m here to tell you that vanilla sex is okay. I’m here to tell you that vanilla sex is good. I’m here to tell you that vanilla sex is fun! So why do the BDSM Brigade insist on sneering at and dismissing anyone who’s into vanilla sex? It’s especially annoying when you take into account this remark from Andrea Dworkin.

"Those of us who have different notions of eroticism and sensuality are simply dismissed. The pejorative word [being] 'vanilla,' which is ironically, one of the most sensual aromas."

Andrea is right. Vanilla has lasted for a good reason: people like it.

Don’t judge

If you are into BDSM or extremely kinky sex, that’s great! In my view whatever helps you enjoy your time in the bedroom without hurting anyone is fine by me. But if you insist on judging other people by your own sexual standards, then I’m afraid you need to take a long hard look at yourself in the mirror. People are different and have different ways of enjoying sex. So what if I don’t like being tied up and hung from a ceiling? At least I can have an orgasm without the need for dozens of chains, whips, bull gags and ropes. You see how the insults can work both ways?

So to the BDSM groupies I have one message for you; what you do is great! I admire it and I respect you for it. But please remember that not everyone is like you and ‘vanilla sex’ is more enjoyable for some people then kinky sex.