F Buddy - better sex guide

Sex and sleep

EdBennett — Tue, 28 Sep 2021 22:29:28 +0000

28 Sep 2021 - 23:29 | Tags: being better in bed, sex health, better sex guide

When we use the word “sleep” and the word “sex” in the same sentence, it usually has very little to do with sleeping! This is especially true when you are sending time with a fuck buddy. The reasons to meet up and hang out have very little to do with catching 30 winks! In fact, for many people, when they start sleeping with a fuck buddy for the first time the number of hours spent sleep dramatically drops! This is not a problem in the short term of course. It is very normal, and is something that we all go through. Having periods of time where we sleep less in our lives is something that the human body can cope quite well with. If you go out and hook up, I think the person you hook up with is going to be rather disappointed if you end up sending your time asleep! They are looking for something more and I expect that you were looking for the same! So what is the issue with the reduction in sleep that having a fuck buddy can cause?

According to the NHS website, “Everyone's experienced the fatigue, short temper and lack of focus that often follow a poor night's sleep.” This is likely true. Everyone has pulled an overnighter at some point, and we all suffer the next day from it. We experience a depression in cognitive functions, our body responses are slowed by the reduction in response time that is caused by the lack of sleep, our coordination and balance are also upset. If the sleep deprivation continues for a few days, the effects can become more serious. According to the NHS website, “…your brain will fog, making it difficult to concentrate and make decisions. You'll start to feel down, and may fall asleep during the day. Your risk of injury and accidents at home, work and on the road also increases.” The depression on happiness is a tangible one. If you are having sex with a fuck buddy a big part of that is about being happier as a person. Any gain you get from the sex could ben offset by the lack of sleep, resulting in a net zero, or worse, a loss rather a gain. You are also worse in bed if you are tired, as having sex is a physical act. So what is the advice here?

If you want to have great sex with your fuck buddy and have a happier life, get enough sleep. A lack of sleep affects everything that you do and that you are. It changes how you react, subtly, in all circumstances. So whilst you are sleeping with someone, do also make sure that you sleep!

Top sex tips to be a better fuck buddy

EdBennett — Wed, 22 Sep 2021 20:32:54 +0000

22 Sep 2021 - 21:32 | Tags: top tips for being sexy, being better in bed, better sex guide

In the world of adult dating, one of the biggest thing we focus on is finding and keeping a fuck buddy. This makes a lot of sense. Sometimes finding someone to have a hook up with can take time and effort. This can often be the biggest barrier to a great sex life. Once you have a fuck buddy or a friends with benefits relationship set up and in place, it can be that the rest slots into place. You also have someone else who is helping you get there too! With that in mind we often spend a lot of time focusing on the external. How we look, what other people think of us, how to get to the close. We often neglect to spend time or effort thinking about ourselves and how we can be better fuck buddies. When I say this, I do not only mean a better fuck for the other person, I also mean a better fuck buddy for ourselves. Having a good time in bed is as import for us as for the person we are hooking up with, so a little time and effort working on ourselves can be a great thing. With that in mind, here are my top tips for how to be a better fuck buddy.

Learn about your body

Take some time to explore your own body. This applies whether you are a man or a woman. Understanding your own body and how it works is key to having great sex. Your fuck buddy can’t read your mind, so if you know your body, you can better guide them to the ultimate pleasure of you both.

Know your turn offs

If you know what turns you off, you can simply eliminate them from the sexual encounter. It is easy to get rid of them, knowing exactly what they are can take time though. Once you spot a turn-off, make a mental note and then be sure to mention it to your fuck buddy.

Exercise

Keep in great shape will lead to great sex. I would particularly recommend that you do kegel exercises which will help to grow and tone key internal muscles that are used during sex. A good set of kegels with some other body toning exercises every week will make all the difference!

So there are three top tips to being a better fuck buddy. Have fun!

Making the most of sex during extended lock down

EdBennett — Thu, 24 Jun 2021 23:25:23 +0000

25 Jun 2021 - 00:25 | Tags: COVID-19 sex, Coronavirus and sex, better sex guide

Here in the UK we were all looking forward to the major lifting of restrictions. Soon we would all be able to once more go where we want, do what we want, have sex with who we want to without the strict regulations that were put in place due to the spread of the coronavirus pandemic. However, sadly for all of us, Boris Johnson extended the current rules and we are all not getting out of lockdown yet. It will happen, but we are all going to have to make the best of what we have. So with that in mind, if you already have a fuck buddy, how can you make the best of the sex that you are having right now, despite the restrictions that have been in place? Well here are my top tips to making the most of having sex with your fuck buddy in lock down.

Get yourself mentally in the right head space

Lock down and reduce contact with people for the last year has left us all in a different space. People are more depressed generally, more deflated, less motivated. So I urge you to get yourself in the right headspace where you are upbeat and want to have sex. Maybe that means putting on some music and dancing around, maybe that means watching a hot film or reading a steamy book, or maybe that means playing with yourself first. What ever you need to do, do it!

Build up with non-penetrative action

The nice thing about having a fuck buddy is that you both know where you are going with it. You are both going to have sex, you both want to have sex… and this can mean that you get to it too quickly. The sex is always going to be better with a build up, so make a decision to have some non-penetrative fun first. Kiss, stroke, fondle… what ever you want to do, go ahead and do it. When you get to the sex, it will be better for it.

Go for the grind, not just in and out

Yes having sex is a lot of in and out, but once you are in, consider grinding more. It is a simple thing, but more grinding is more stimulation for the woman. It is also great for the man, extends the sex and means the end is more explosive.

I hope these tips help you make the most of your time whilst things are still opening up.

Reasons your fuck buddy may not enjoy sex

EdBennett — Wed, 29 Apr 2020 16:16:00 +0000

29 Apr 2020 - 17:16 | Tags: how to avoid bad sex, better sex guide, reasons for affairs

For most people, sex is generally really good. Whilst you may get better at sex over time, sex is not something that most people have to work at in order to enjoy doing it. They might want to enjoy it more, so they make work at it for that reason, but for many people, it comes quite naturally. For a few people, however, sex is not that enjoyable. That is not to say it is unenjoyable all of the time, but they may have periods of time where it is unenjoyable, or they may have certain obstacles that they need to overcome in order to open the door to the boundless pleasures that sex can bring. So if you have a fuck buddy that does not seem to be enjoying themselves in bed with you, whilst your instinct may be to blame yourself which would take you down quite a negative neural pathway, instead I would urge you to talk to your fuck buddy about it. If you approach it in a non-judgemental, open way, you might find that the conversation takes you to places where you can find solutions to the problems and overcome them together. Helping a fuck buddy enjoy sex more will forever enshrine you in their mind as the person who opened their pleasure centers… if you have the opportunity to be that person you need to take it! It makes you feel like a sexual god!

Natural pain

Around 75% of women have reported feeling or experiencing pain during sex at some point in their lives. Note the “some point.” This is not regular, this is something that can happen sometimes. It could be caused by all sorts of things, lack of lubrication, becoming accustomed to the size of a man's member, some kind of health issue. If your fuck buddy is having pain, be really open to talking about it and help find the solution. They will fuck you forever for it!

Infections

Vaginal infections such as yeast infections are common enough to be considered normal should they occur. If they do occur, the solution is taking medical advice and following the guidance till it is cured. Being patient with your fuck buddy whilst they are dealing with this will pay its dividends in bed once it is sorted. Hormonal changes can also cause dryness in the vagina, and for the lubricant is the perfect quick fix.

Male pain

Men can also have pain during sex, and if they do it could also be caused by an infection, the solution to which can be found with your local doctor. Problems with the prostate can also cause pain and this ought to be checked out quickly. There could also be, ahem, what one might describe as structural abnormalities in the penis. Again, if your fuck buddy is experiencing all or any of this, being supportive will pay itself back in the long term.

Psychological holdbacks

Stress and anxiety are orgasm killers. It is very hard to reach a good climax if there is a lot going on, especially in terms of stressful situations. There are also some people who identify in a certain way which can affect their sexual experiences. People who are demisexual may only experience sexual pleasure in very few situations, such as when they feel in love with a partner. In this case, it will take time and investment to be able to help with this, and only you can make the decision to whether you feel you want to follow through.

So if you are finding that you or your current hook up are not enjoying the sex, it is well worth addressing it. Finding and fixing the problem will open the sexual doors of delight.

How to use music when having sex

EdBennett — Thu, 28 Nov 2019 22:14:12 +0000

28 Nov 2019 - 22:14 | Tags: music and sex, better sex guide

In this article, I want to assume that you already have a fuck buddy. You have taken the steps to get one: you went online, made a profile, messaged a bunch of people, had a couple come back, met up with one or two of them in person and you ended the night by hooking up. It is all good in your book. You now have a fuck buddy (or two!) and you are having sex. All is well.

Now that you are having sex, you are starting to think about things you can do to improve the quality of the sex. You have done the basics, you have cleaned your place up and made sure that the bedroom is hygienically clean. Past that, what else can you do? There are a number of se toys and devices that can be purchased and used during sex. These can be a great asset to any session and really fun to use. I will cover these in a separate article all about sex toys at a later date. For today, I would like to talk about how you can use music when having sex.

With a fuck buddy, you do not have the usual strings and problems that are associated with a long-term relationship. You don’t have to meet all their friends, you don’t have to court their family, you certainly don’t need to spend long hours engaged with social events that you little to no interest in. A no strings attached relationship means exactly that, no strings attached! What some people make mistakes is where it comes to emotion.

It is true that with a fuck buddy you do not have to be “in love” or form long term emotional attachments to, but a lack of attachment does not mean a lack of emotion. There is emotion in everything that we do, and this is especially true of sex. The stronger the emotion, the more fully we will “feel” the experience of that sex.

Music can be used to boost that emotion. Certain songs, tunes and melodies are carefully crafted to spike an emotional reaction within us. Music, when played during sex, can enhance that emotion and cause us to have better more full sex! The music does not have to be lovey-dovey nonsense. It just has to be music that speaks to you in some way.

Next time your fuck buddy is popping over for a session, think about popping some music on. For best results, prep a playlist called “music to have sex by” and have it ready to do. You will find that the sex can instantly improve.

Top three tips to upskill your sex life!

EdBennett — Tue, 07 May 2019 16:58:04 +0000

7 May 2019 - 17:58 | Tags: better sex guide, how to get more sex, top tips for being sexy

Adult dating has become very normal in the modern western world, and what a relief it is that this has happened. Sex is something that makes everyone healthier and happier. It is good for the brain as it stimulates blood flow, it is good for the body as it is a legitimate calorie burning exercise, it is good for the soul as it releases happy hormones into the body that raise a sense of well being and, well, happiness! Sex is excellent, and we should all be having more of it.

Once you have a fuck buddy or a friend with benefits, you might be thinking about wanting to improve your sex life. This is a good thing! Upskilling your sex is a great way to make the experience better for both of you. Better sex means more of the good stuff listed above. Better sex also leads to more sex! If you both have a good time, you will find that your fuck buddy comes running back for more frequently. So how can you upskill you sex life? Here are my three top tips!

Look after your little man

Most people pay attention to how they look. They wash their clothes, they keep their hair looking nice and trimmed, they pay attention to how they smell… the one thing that many en neglect is how they are doing down under. This is such an easy thing to address and will upskill you in the bedroom. Think about getting a trimmer and trimming some of the hair around your ball sack and scrotum. Keep the whole area super clean… a clean penis is one that a woman is more likely to want to put inside her. Consider moisturising, there are huge benefits from having a soft cock, your fuck buddy will love it. In the event that something happens, go to a doctor immediately and get it checked out. It is worth getting over the temporary embarrassment in return for long term sexual performance.

Play games: no hands

Playing games in the bedroom is a great way to upskill! Things that are fun but teasing are perfect. Try having sex with your fuck buddy but you are not allowed to use your hands. This is such a good one. Another variation is to go down on her, but the second she uses her hands to do anything you stop!

Practice makes perfect

Have more sex. They say practice makes perfect, and it really does! The more sex you have, the better you can become… IF you reflect afterwards. Each time, think about something that you want to focus on doing during that sex session. This could be spend longer going down on your friends with benefits, or it could be to make sure your fuck buddy is completely relaxed before getting to it. Reflection then practice is the key.

So good luck, and have fun!

How to biohack your way to better sex Part 2

EdBennett — Sun, 31 Mar 2019 14:04:04 +0000

31 Mar 2019 - 15:04 | Tags: biohacking sex, better sex guide, how to have better orgasms

If you are reading this, it is because you are on the fuck buddy website, unless someone has stolen this article and cut and pasted it onto a separate website, in which case shame on you for taking my work! If you are here you probably already have someone that you are having sex with. Given how much sex is a fundamental part of our health and happiness, once you start looking it is easier than you might think to have a hook up or find a friends with benefits relationship. There are as many women who want them as much as men do, so it is just case of finding each other, after that you can enjoy being fuck buddys for as long as it is good for both of you. So, if you are here I am going to assume that you have a fuck buddy. This article follows up with more details on a previous article about using biohacking for better sex. For details on what biohacking is, see that article.

The biohacking ethos

Treat the problem, not the symptom. So if you have erectile dysfunction for example, you could take a pill which would help solve this in the short term. That pill fixes the symptom by making you hard, but does nothing for the underlying problem which is still there.

Diet for better sex

This is the obvious one. If you are on an unhealthy diet you are going to struggle more with anything physical. Anything at all! If you are overweight you are performing all physical tasks sub-optimally, which includes sex. If you never eat anything with vitamins and minerals in it, you are not giving your body what it needs. Imagine having a Ferrari car, then complaining when it drives badly if you put diesel in it instead of petrol. Eating tons of sugar, oil and salt is like putting paint thinner in your engine. Just don’t do it.

Fitness

Being fit is great for sex. Your body is in great condition, you are able to move and perform well, blood flow is good! Watch out for HIT workouts if you are a man. High intensity workouts release stress hormones which reduce testosterone in the body and this has been proven to reduce sex drive. So be fit but stay away from too much HIT!

Take a test and focus on happy hormones

You can go to the doctor and get a full set of tests done to find out about your hormone levels and what you can do to improve things like testosterone. These are simple to implement, eating more fibre or flax seeds can help to inhibit something called Aromatase which turns testosterone into oestrogen, so reducing this will increase testosterone and your sex drive. It is all about measuring where you are at then taking action based on that.

Relax and enjoy your fuck buddy

The biggest thing is always to relax. The more relaxed you are the better that everything works and flows. You can also biohack this: no caffeine after 2pm to sleep better, no phones in bed to reduce blue light etc. Be relaxed and you are good to go.

So there we go. Think about biohacking your way to a better sex life. You will not regret it!

Biohacking for better sex

EdBennett — Fri, 22 Feb 2019 15:38:15 +0000

22 Feb 2019 - 15:38 | Tags: better sex guide, sex health, biohacking sex

Once you have found a fuck buddy and you are generally having hook ups on a regular basis, most people turn their focus and energy away from seeking more partners and towards increasing the fun that is to be had with those said partners. Makes sense, once you have the quantity, you want to start making sure that you improve the quality of your time together. When it comes to being better in bed, there is a ton of information out there. Books, videos, advice columns… everyone seems to have an opinion on the subject. There are also a number of approaches that you can take to improving you and your fuck buddy’s time in bed together. You can look at technique, you can work on your “inner game” better described as your own psychology surrounding sex, you can also choose to explore personal fantasy for both of you which is a great way to boost your sex life. You can also take it from two angles, making your fuck buddy have a better time whilst having sex, or making yourself have a better time. Whilst the two are linked, most actions tend to improve one side more than the other. The one thing that people often neglect to talk about is the biology.

It is widely accepted that “we are what we eat.” Your body is ultimately made up of the matter from food that has been processed and reconstituted to grow your various parts. We know that if we eat badly we look and feel differently, so why should this not be true of how we do in bed? Well, it is true we just generally don’t really think about it that much. We can alter our sex lives and performance in bed by changing the chemicals that we put into our bodies. This is called biohacking.

There are extreme examples of biohacking out there in the field of sexual enjoyment and performance. Dave Asprey, the founder of Bulletproof Coffee and the man that most people attribute the term “biohacking” to has taken some rather extreme steps. Dave regularly injects his penis with stem cells. He says that this is a perfect cure for erectile disfunction, but he also claims that he has no problems with erectile disfunction so go figure. Regardless, he still does it, and whilst I am not suggesting that you go to such extreme lengths, unless of course you do have erectile disfunction issues in which case go and try it, I am saying that you should think about what you put into your body in order to have better sex.

For now I will leave you to think about it. You can even talk to your fuck buddy about it, doing something like this with someone else is an excellent way to ensure that you both go the distance. I will follow this up with a more details article on the subject. For now, look after yourself and have fun!

Better Sex Guide: Always assume that the other person loved the sex

EdBennett — Fri, 12 Aug 2016 17:51:30 +0000

12 Aug 2016 - 18:51 | Tags: better sex guide, better in bed for men, sex tips

When we have sex, regardless of how enlightened we are about the act, how rounded a view we take on it and how much we come to understand that it is more than just about coming – some part of us checks in on whether the other person has come or not. We also care about whether the other person has a good time – which is what this check in is rooted in. Again, only the most selfish sell centred (to the point of genuine medically diagnosable social issues) ignore whether the other person has enjoyed themselves – and infact our own enjoyment of the sex is tied into this. If the other person has had a good time then we do too. No matter how good the sex feels – if you glance up from your near orgasm extasy to see the other person’s face – and they look bored – this is a guaranteed mood killer. Why does it kill it? It ends our pleasure because our joy is tied into whether they are enjoying it.

The Ego

This is all tied into the ego. Sex isn’t just about how it physically feels – it is also about how it emotionally feels. There is no removing that, and frankly why would you want to, I mean it is part of what makes sex awesome. We want the other person to want us, not to want anyone, us. It is about you wanting to feel special, you wanting to know that they want YOU over anyone else that they could have had... and this is where it ties in. If they love it, then they want you. If they have a shit time then they may as well have slept with any one else. You are not special.

The dangerous cycle

If you think that they are having a shit time, then this makes you turned off. You are less likely to orgasm, and you are certainly not going to have a very good time. The danger is that they then look at you having a crap time – and this in turn makes them have a crap time! Isn’t it amazing – it feeds back into itself! See the same is true for them, they want to feel like they please, that you want *them* over other people. So how do you avoid this cycle?

Assume they love it

You can’t ignore reality for long, and you don’t want to. There is a grey area though, and when you first sleep with someone it is unlikely to be mind blowing because you are new to each other. So avoid this cycle by assuming that they had a good time. Don’t question it, don’t ask, just assume it. As you get to know each other better you will change how you fuck each other till it is amazing, but until then just trust that they like it, and that they like YOU. That is the most important part.

So when you get a new fuck buddy, just trust in yourself. You are awesome in the sack. You are. Trust me.

Using candles to make things hotter in the bedroom

EdBennett — Tue, 12 Jul 2016 17:28:36 +0000

12 Jul 2016 - 18:28 | Tags: sex games, better sex guide, kinky sex

So you have a fuck buddy and everything is great. You are having a really time with her/him, you think they are hot, they think you are hot, you have brilliant sex together, all in well in the world. You have gotten past the first fuck stage (the first time is never great – too many nerves and being unsure of the other persons lines and positions etc etc) and you are into the have great sex section. You have started to mix up the sex positions, you haven’t only done missionary, you have found a real love of doggy style, or the reverse cowgirl or another position that just seems to work really well for the two of you. Things are going brilliantly... but you still would like to hot things up in the bedroom a little more. Well I have a really nice solution for you... candles.

Candles are brilliant for all sorts of reasons. Their affect on sex is largely underrated, and there it is about more than just lighting – thought that is important and makes a really big difference. Allow me to take you through their uses.

Everyone looks better in mood lighting

How the other person looks makes a big difference to how turned on you get – and the same is true for them. The better that you look the more turned on they get. Candles are brilliant for this. They give off a natural soft mood lighting that makes everyone look sexier! Lines, wrinkles, even large amounts of fat deposits all vanish under the warming soft glow of a candle. So go light a candle.

They heat the room ready for being naked

The cold can be a real mood killer. If you undress and get cold you immediately regret getting rid of your warming jumper. Being cold can really kill the libido, it is easier to come when comfortable and relaxed, and being cold brings tension into the body. Candles give off heat, and if you have a number of them lit, they can really heat the room up to a high temperature.... making the room a perfect place to get yoru kit off and get down and dirty!

They show preparation and effort – without having to make an effort

How hard is it to put some candles and light them? It is piss easy is what it is. Yet it still tells the other person that you have made an effort! It is a huge EASY win!

They are cheap

Night lights are super cheap – they cost bugger all. Pick some up from Ikea and you are ready to go!

So get some candles going in your bedroom and get that heat turned up for a fucking good night. Literally.