Why getting good as sex is a life investment

EdBennett — Fri, 20 Jul 2018 13:15:06 +0000

20 Jul 2018 - 14:15 | Tags: getting good at sex, turn on techniques

As we grow older we get better at nearly everything that we do. When we are first born we can’t even walk, but as adults we are so good at it we never even have to think about walking! There are many things that we master to a high skill level without consciously having to make an effort to get good at it, not just walking. Talking, eating with cutlery, making “niceties” with other people. There are also some things that we can learn to do at a functional level without active effort, but without deciding to get better at them, we rarely make it past the “okay” rating. These include playing sports, doing our jobs, and yes, you guessed it, sex.

We can all have functional sex, and once you have had sex a few times, you start to get better at it. The initial nervousness drops away, you become more confident in both your own body and what you are chosing to do with it. The feels, actions and hormones all become more familiar to you, and as that happens you begin to refine your technique. You start to learn what really works and what doesn’t, and you develop your own personal tastes on what your preferences are. However, without making a decision to want to get good at sex, you will rarely make it past this stage. It does not matter how many hooks ups you have, or the number of fuck buddies you have slept with, unless you are trying to get better, you will simply enjoy it for what it is without advancing your skill level.

Why get better at sex?

There are many things that you will want to do for most of your life, and so it is worth getting good at these things. You are probably going to drive for 40 years, so it is worth spending the effort learning to do it well. You are going to be doing your job to earn money for decades, so getting better at it so you can earn more money makes sense. You are going to want to have sex for a long time, whether you are sleeping with a friend with benefits or you end up in a long term relationship, being good at sex will enhance the time that you spend with that other person for both you and your sexual partner. The rewards that you reap in the long term will be tangible.

So make an effort and get better at sex. Talk to your fuck buddy about what they are enjoying, or things that they think you are doing well. Next time you have a hook up be really sensitive to the other person, and also use it as an opportunity to try new things. Most importantly, always remember to have fun!

How to have amazing sex: Part 1 – emotion

EdBennett — Tue, 11 Oct 2016 18:59:13 +0000

11 Oct 2016 - 19:59 | Tags: how to have amazing sex, sex is great, great sex, getting good at sex

When we think about sex, we generally think of it in physical terms. You meet someone, you get hard, you start to think that you really want to fuck them... then hopefully you end up fucking them. I mean that’s certainly what generally happens here at f-buddy, because everyone is here for the same thing, they all want to get laid, it generally results in everyone, well, getting laid!

So when people think about the times they have great sex, they remember it being good, but they rarely think about why it was good. What made it really good sex, as opposed to the times when sex was simply just alright, okay, or felling good but not great. This is what I am going to be talking about right now.

So let’s think back to the times that the sex was really good, and I mean better than good, I am talking the times you had great sex. What are the consistent regular factors? What are the elements that are the same every time, the things that are always there... because these are the ingredients that make up great sex for you. They are different for everyone, however there are some really common ones that cross over to many people. So here are some of the common things:

Emotion

This is the biggest one. There was a strong emotion at the time that you had the sex. I say this carefully, because it does not have to be an emotion that is on the theoretical list of “good” emotions. Most people think only “good emotions” build connections, important memories, strong experiences that we crave... actually this is incorrect. It is not good emotions that build it, it is more simply strong emotions. If when you have sex there is a strong emotion of *any* kind, this will make the sex feel stronger – and therefore contribute towards having great sex. For some people this can mean the emotion is “love” or extreme “lust” or any other more positive emotion. However it can equally be angry, pain driven, or even a desire to hurt or whilst feeling hurt by the other person. This is one of the reasons break up sex can be so amazing. The emotions are so high, the strength of feeling is so strong, that the sex is inevitably more likely to be great sex. When the emotion is high, the sex is likely to be better.

Want to know more? Read the other parts of this series of articles on this blog!

F Buddy - getting good at sex

Why getting good as sex is a life investment

Why get better at sex?

How to have amazing sex: Part 1 – emotion